It’s really easy to avoid being the observer. We humans do it every second of every day. We only see what our subconscious mind sees, or we succumb to those neuropeptides that send the predictable signals. Our cells are hungry for those neuropeptides, waiting as receptors, and our conscious mind actually would rather experience that rush more than food, drink, or any other stimulus.
Our brains are wondrous things. I’ve been watching fabulous documentaries about quantum physics lately (for another project) and I have actually been applying what I’ve been learning to my memoir.
I’m the observer. It’s what physicists say human beings can do all the time, without knowing anything else about physics, to understand how incredible our universe and world actually are. And because I don’t have my own Hubble telescope, I have to simply observe the world around me through my own eyeballs.
What do I see?
1. Me afraid of looking at some things too closely. Becoming an observer, a memoir writer, you often see things that you’ve only glanced at sparingly for years come to life. And simply observing, really seeing these things, you come to radically different conclusions than you did the first time you experienced them.
2. The world working differently than I always thought it worked. The good aren’t as good as I thought and the bad aren’t as bad. We’re all human beings on the same planet and rather than polarize everyone into opposite corners, I’m realizing that we’re all going to have to interact together MORE in the ensuing years. What does this mean?
For everyone else reading this blog, it doesn’t mean one thing. For ME, however, it means a lot. I realize that for the world to change for the better, the change starts, MUST START with me. If I am real, perhaps others will be real. But I don’t get to make a deal “if you’re real, I’ll be real” because it’s juvenile for one thing and it’s forsaking the role of observer.
3. My attitude, my bitterness, my own issues are truly at fault in most of what I’m remembering. I have to start by taking responsibility for MY actions.
That’s it. That’s what I see.
That’s the observer. I’ve been glossing over certain parts of my history because it’s easier.
How can I possibly expect to change until I change my observer self and actually see what I’ve been doing?
Read some quantum physics if you’re curious about this thought process. Fascinating stuff. I was so scared of it for so long and now it’s the greatest thrill to realize (for me) how incredibly awesome our Creator is.
Have a great day.